This is a true story.
Once upon a time there was a lady called Arabella (the name has been changed to protect the ‘innocent’). She was slim, elegant and well-coiffeured. She was the sort of lady that my grandmother would have said ‘had more money than sense’. Always the centre of attention she delighted in playing to her audience. If an entrance was to be made Arabella would know how to do it, and make sure that everyone saw. Her clothes were expensive, and always absolutely perfect for the occasion. Of course, she never wore the same thing twice unless the company was different. She was married to a man with a title, and it was for that exact reason that she had married him. It gave her a standing, albeit a fairly lowly one.
One evening there was a cocktail party. Arabella arrived on the arm of her companion. She wore the most exquisite little black dress. Silk and chiffon stitched to perfection. The neckline was not too low, and the length was not too short. Her heels were exactly the right height to compliment her escort, and her shining hair was tossed from side to side as she listened attentively to every word that was spoken to her. Arabella’s responses were perfect, she always knew exactly what to say and also when to laugh, her tinkling tones neither too loud nor too soft. As always her presence was perfection.
At some point during the evening there was a slight lull in the conversation. It was the moment for which Arabella had been waiting. She had an announcement to make and everyone must know.
‘I’ve decided to take up golf!’
The men in the room flocked to her side. Offers of all sorts were bandied about, there was no limit to the amount of time they were willing to devote to teaching her. The best sources of equipment were also offered, and all this knowing that ladies and men really don’t mix in golf clubs! Arabella spurned them all, no, she was ‘going to a Professional’. From this time on all gatherings took on a different perspective. Somehow the main subject was always ‘golf’! The tinkling laugh still made its appearance, the clothes continued to be perfect, but everyone had to know how things were going, and of course her ‘Professional’ was very pleased with her.
This continued for a good two years, and then it appeared that Arabella had become a little bored with golf, because a whole six months passed with no mention of the subject. Finally one of the men could stand it no longer. He asked the question that was on everyone’s lips.
‘How is the golf going, Arabella?’
‘Oh, it’s really exciting. My Professional is so pleased with me he has said that next week I can start practising with a ball.’
This was first published on nuvofelt.blogspot.com